[OKAY.... At least he actually has more than one, now. RIP the other kusanagi blade, abandoned in a dead god's eye socket. But hey, they did him a solid by making him twin blades out of aforementioned dead god's teeth, so like. Upgrades all the way.
He pauses a moment, seemingly torn on which to draw. L..eft?? Right?? He uses them for different things, and-- Okay, he'll go with left, that's more the thrusty one, usually. And that's how Kratos and Zelos do the motion when channeling lightning down into the stab. So okay.]
[They can work on DOUBLE FIREBALL BLADE (DOUBLE HELL PYRE???) or whatever later. ANYWAY, he points his sword out in front of him, and motions for Lloyd to do the same.]
Before the flames appear, do you feel anything? Any sort of sensation, like a warmth or a tingle? Or do they just appear?
[he's absolutely going to learn hell pyre BUT OKAY. He follows suit readily, posture straight, shoulders set, sword held up and out and even. This, at least, is familiar. Ready and waiting for instruction from Kratos, each facing the other with a blade in hand. For once in his life, perfectly attentive.
Though the question has him consider. Hmm...]
Usually I'm kind of distracted, and it's pretty sudden but.... A sort of heat, I guess? [it's fucking fire of course there's heat.] Or-- Well, warmth, maybe that's a better word. The actual heat is usually after.
[You know because he fucking sets himself on fire like an idiot.] Then there was that one time I tried and blew up half your kitchen. [smfh that the huge scorch mark is ETERNALLY THERE ON THE WALL]
[It's been a while since they've done this, just had a chill training day. Except this time there's probably going to be a lot more fire involved, but that's fine. He has healing magic, they'll live.]
Heh. That's why we're doing this outside.
[He is so unbothered by the kitchen man like don't even worry about it. He might even be smiling just a tiny bit.]
Anyway. A warmth, you say? It feels a bit like that when I'm manipulating mana. If this is similar, then with practice you should be able to redirect it to a particular point.
[To demonstrate, he preforms a simplified Lightning Blade. Where does the lightening come from THE SKY? HIS SWORD? Who can really tell it's lightning.]
[Lightning is TOO FAST TO SEE? I guess whatever the maximum draw distance upwards is, that's where it comes from. Who knows. It's cool, and he's watching intently-- both to the movement (steps, angle of the blade held, motion of it--) and the point of which that flash hits, a bolted strike that sears into his retinas and leaves a ghostly outline when he blinks, if only for a few seconds.]
So... I have to move it. [The-- mana, magic, fire, whatever. He's clearly working at understand it on his own terms. 'Manipulating mana', while absolutely accurate, physically means nothing to him. He doesn't know what mana feels like. But this is a good estimation, trying to process what Kratos is explaining.]
Wherever that feeling is, just move it out, and then let it go?
[He lifts the sword a little bit, clearly shifting his focus to it, brows creasing, and just trying to... figure out where that sensation comes from. His chest? Skin? The weird centering chi stuff Law talked about sometimes? His brows furrow, clearly just-- trying to think about this, but also not too hard because he would love to go a stretch of like two days without getting burns and blisters somewhere.
After a long moment of nothing happening he sighs, drops his arm with the blade, and brings up the other to scratch at his head.]
This is actually pretty hard. Trying to sort of... focus on it but not let it actually happen yet?
Kratos doesn't seem too surprised by the lack of results. This is, after all, a weird new thing they're dealing with. He sheaths his sword and approaches to give Lloyd a hair ruffle.]
I know it sounds simple in theory, but it may be a while before you start to see results. I would think that with your exsphere, you should have an easier time with it, but... Actually, how is your exsphere?
[the last time he really paid attention to it, it kind of looked like shit bro. son. broson.]
[Really, not quite understanding what he's doing and not getting achievable results within like 20 seconds should be expected. But he still frowns, ready to try again-- oh, but yeah. That.]
Uh... a little better than it was? [He swaps hands with the sword, not quite ready to give up, but okay with this little break and the encouragement. And he'll bring up his hand to showcase it- still matte, still far too dark, but that dark, streaking discolouration seeping out from under his keycrest looks less like necrotic distorted veins, and more defined and glossy patches. So maybe?? Slow improvement? Or slow transformation. Who can say.]
I don't know if it's that relic curse or from being in so much of that incense or what... [And he wasn't really in a position to actually discuss it immediately afterwards.] I... was definitely in a lot of the incense that day.
[You know, carrying around the source of it like an idiot.] But I haven't really left Coatepec since then, and it looks less dead so I'm thinking 'incense.'
[Maybe once you're 4000 years old you'll get better at being patient too.
Considering the fact that so far, it seems like everyone who's transformed has done so pretty much instantaneously, Lloyd slowly transforming into A Thing isn't up at the top of Kratos's list of concerns right now. He takes Lloyd's hand and leans in for a closer look, brow knitting together a bit and for just a moment. He's concerned, of course, but he's not sure what he should be concerned about in this situation.]
I would think that it's probably the incense as well, but it's entirely possible that both things are factoring into this. Is this painful at all?
[He rubs at a bit of the discolored skin coming from under Lloyd's keycrest with his thumb. This is MMMMaybe a bit alarming? Not that Kratos ever looks that alarmed, but look this isn't normal.]
[idk fam being 4000 years old sounds kind of awful. but then again being dead also sounds kind of weird and scary. Who the fuck knows he's a goddamned teenager leave him alone about mortality and lifespans and shit.
Look, he knows Enough about Exspheres, though. As much as Dirk had told him (a very neutered version, be that on purpose, or because surface living distanced him from the truth, who knows), and then as much as he'd learned over the whole journey. And them looking all weird like this is definitely not anything he's heard of. And Kratos not knowing about it either?
Kind of amps up the unease. Not that he'll let that show. After all, what is there to even do about it? He won't survive well in this place without his exsphere, so removing it for good isn't an option. At least he doesn't flinch or anything as it's pressed on, and even flexes his hand normally.]
It doesn't really hurt. [But based on that response, doesn't feel quite normal either.] Before this, sometimes it'd start itching if I was out in the incense for too long. But I'd try not to stay out too long after that, since I know it makes you kinda crazy.
[Like 'stab your best friend several times with the intent to kill' crazy. You know.]
Kratos also doesn't let his unease show, since freaking the boy out would be counterproductive. He releases Lloyd's hand and reaches up to squeeze his shoulder, which is probably just as much to comfort himself as it was for Lloyd. It's fine don't worry about it.]
I see. Perhaps removing this for a little while to see if it clears up wouldn't be a bad idea. Or have you already tried that?
Healing artes don't work as well without one, right? I thought I remembered the Professor saying that... [ONE DAY HE'LL STOP FRYING HIMSELF??] And, you know, with this place being how it is, it didn't seem like a good idea...
[he probably should have, smfh, ITS FINE HE'S AN IDIOT.] I could try now, though? For a few days?
Perhaps if you were out by yourself and there was a chance that you'd need to fight, it would be wise not to be without it. As long as you're with someone who can heal you and just stay in town for a little while, there shouldn't be any harm in going without it for a couple days.
[It's fine man Kratos didn't think until JUST NOW to suggest he take it off to begin with. They're both idiots.]
[HMM. It's. Logical. And he looks down at it again, considering. He hasn't really gone an extended period without it in.... Well, really, since Dirk had let him begin equipping it. But Kratos is right, there wasn't any harm. Just to see.
But a selfish part of him doesn't like the implications of it, should removing it improve things.]
...Okay. Remind me when we're done with this, and I'll... Let you hang onto it, or something.
[Gonna be weird man, but okay. It's better than melting inside or whatever the fuck is happening.]
Should I keep it on now? You said it might make the mana-using easier.
[Well, ok. Tbh, that does make him feel better. At least he doesn't routinely lose things, and clearly Kratos trusts him to actually do it. And so he nods, lifting the sword again and letting the opposite hand drop.]
Yeah. Maybe I should think about it less?
[Less thinking, more doing. It's worked with everything else in his life. And so he'll take a few steps to put some distance between them, just in case, and sigh out a breath. Okay. Not the time to worry about his weird hand and exsphere. Just gotta try and figure out how to trigger that spark around him without being pissed off, and without letting it manifest on his damn skin.
His eyes close for a moment again, trying to concentrate on that feeling again. And this time, trying not to think or restrain or cage away from the idea that he'll probably just be hurting himself again. Like a warmth, or a sort of tingle, or heat? Or maybe just like a feeling like a strong emotion? Imagining feeling something like that, and casting it out--
This time he tries a little longer, and while there's no flash of flame along the blade of his sword, there is absolutely a line of fire that follows the direction of it, only on the ground. So, you know, a few feet too low. But the same direction??? The concept?? And his pants aren't on fire, so that's great.]
-Woah! [He's still gonna step back, though. Because, HEY, FIRE. A long, thin line of it, about four or five feet from him, casually burning away. Nice.]
[Look Kratos trusts Lloyd way more than he trusts anyone else INCLUDING himself.
He steps back to give Lloyd some space, crossing his arms while he watches Lloyd. He's ready to put out any boy fires or heal any burns, because he's fully expecting an accident or five before Lloyd really gets it. BUT, then Lloyd's slinging flames from his sword. The ground is a little crispy and on fire a bit, but that's still way better than Kratos had been expecting.]
That-- that was great, Lloyd!
[LLOYD He's so proud of you!! Kratos uncrosses his arms, gives Lloyd a manly pat on the shoulder, and goes over to inspect the flames.]
You're really getting the hang of this quicker than I expected. It took me a few weeks to do something like this.
[It definitely came more from like his feet than his sword but it was still away? And not on him? Which is really, really encouraging.]
That... yeah? [He had been about to criticize himself for not getting it right. He managed to get the flames to happen, and make them not on him but the origination point was all wrong, the way it manifested hadn't been what he was hoping for. The only thing that was right was the fact that something happened and the vector of it.
But-- that's not what he gets from Kratos. Instead it's a compliment, another paternal touch to him as a show of pride. No 'sloppy and needs work', no 'unrefined', nothing like that. And so he smile that flickers across his face is dumb and earnest and lopsided as he sheepishly lets his shoulders raise.]
Well-- if Yuan hadn't been teaching you wrong...
[It's said as he tips his head down a bit, not really known what to do with only...? Positive comments there??]
And- I mean, it helps that I did it a lot, before! Just... there was all the incense and stuff, then... And I still gotta figure out how to do it faster and-- you know, right....
[Look he doesn't have to use "YOUR SWORDSMANSHIP IS UNREFINED" to shut down a conversation, he can just be fucking honest and outwardly proud of his son at the same time. MAYBE spending time with Lloyd makes him happy, and MAYBE he's getting a little less afraid of showing it as time goes on.
He even chuckles at Lloyd's comment about shithead Yuan.]
Heh. I'm just happy to see that it's definitely possible to keep from burning yourself. With a little more practice, you'll be able to better control the flame's point of origin.
...Yeah. And doing it without it taking a whole minute will definitely take some work.
[And the whole 'emotional outbursts' thing still is another problem entirely. But hey, at least they're getting closer?? And it gives him an excuse to actually spend time with Kratos, doing things other than avoiding conversation subjects and being awkward.]
Alright! I'll do it as many times as I need, then!
[Yeaaah Kratos might not be able to help as much with the emotional outbursts, mostly because he's so out of touch with his own emotions. Y'know unless Lloyd wants advice for how to feel NOTHING like a ZOMBIE.
He doesn't want that.]
If anyone can do it, it's you. Just be sure you don't over do it.
[Lloyd's already proven that he can do fucking anything. Except for math. Anyway, Kratos returns to Lloyd's side, well out of any potential fireball range.]
[Get that rage curse intense enough again and he will absolutely manage the zombie thing all on his own, no worries there. Won't that be a fun surprise for later...!!
But great, he nods!]
When do I ever! [Overdo it, he means. And the answer is 'always'. But alright, all hopped up and full of encouragement, he looks ahead again, where those flames are petering out. Good thing they're away from any big thickets of greenery.]
Alright... Higher up, this time. And not as far...? [Line of fire=yes, but like. Up, channeled through the blade, and not just on the ground. And perhaps because of the previous success, he'd a bit less careful this time, trying to recall that same feeling, trying to pick a place for it and--
Bursting his damn arm into flames, which immediately has him cursing and batting at it with the other hand. Goddamnit.]
And yes the answer is ALWAYS, but Kratos just lets it slide... in favor of whipping off his COOL scarf and using it to snuff the fire on Lloyd's dumb arm. He wastes no time casting First Aid on the boy.]
Got a bit too excited?
[He's not ripping on him, just trying to find what brought on this little oopsie]
[Very cool, very nice. Thanks for the heals. Once he finally sets out and doesn't have a healer on hand all the time, things are definitely going to get interesting. His nose scrunches in annoyance, and he nods.]
I guess so... I tried to do it faster, I think? [And you know, was blinded by previous success.] Probably got overconfident...
[Which we all know is a slow and insidious killer.]
[Mmmmyeah Kratos is very concerned about that. Like he's sure that Lloyd will be fine, he's a grownass man pretty much, but that doesn't mean that Kratos likes the idea of Lloyd accidentally fireballing himself.]
Probably. Let's not worry about speed until we have technique down. Right now we're at the slow and steady stage.
[It's fine, it's fine. He'll bring a bunch of aloe and bandages and stop to befriend every healer along the way. Still, he'll sigh. kratos is right, because he is capable of patience, but of course Lloyd had been thinking that each time would be a little better than the last, right?
Of course not. Hell, that first time was probably a fluke. Back to square one.]
Yeah... you're right. I guess first is just getting it under control... [Which basically means 'anything that doesn't set himself on fire is progress'. Ugh. Stupid fire curse.]
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[OKAY.... At least he actually has more than one, now. RIP the other kusanagi blade, abandoned in a dead god's eye socket. But hey, they did him a solid by making him twin blades out of aforementioned dead god's teeth, so like. Upgrades all the way.
He pauses a moment, seemingly torn on which to draw. L..eft?? Right?? He uses them for different things, and-- Okay, he'll go with left, that's more the thrusty one, usually. And that's how Kratos and Zelos do the motion when channeling lightning down into the stab. So okay.]
Alright, ready.
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[They can work on DOUBLE FIREBALL BLADE (DOUBLE HELL PYRE???) or whatever later. ANYWAY, he points his sword out in front of him, and motions for Lloyd to do the same.]
Before the flames appear, do you feel anything? Any sort of sensation, like a warmth or a tingle? Or do they just appear?
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Though the question has him consider. Hmm...]
Usually I'm kind of distracted, and it's pretty sudden but.... A sort of heat, I guess? [it's fucking fire of course there's heat.] Or-- Well, warmth, maybe that's a better word. The actual heat is usually after.
[You know because he fucking sets himself on fire like an idiot.] Then there was that one time I tried and blew up half your kitchen. [smfh that the huge scorch mark is ETERNALLY THERE ON THE WALL]
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Heh. That's why we're doing this outside.
[He is so unbothered by the kitchen man like don't even worry about it. He might even be smiling just a tiny bit.]
Anyway. A warmth, you say? It feels a bit like that when I'm manipulating mana. If this is similar, then with practice you should be able to redirect it to a particular point.
[To demonstrate, he preforms a simplified Lightning Blade. Where does the lightening come from THE SKY? HIS SWORD? Who can really tell it's lightning.]
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So... I have to move it. [The-- mana, magic, fire, whatever. He's clearly working at understand it on his own terms. 'Manipulating mana', while absolutely accurate, physically means nothing to him. He doesn't know what mana feels like. But this is a good estimation, trying to process what Kratos is explaining.]
Wherever that feeling is, just move it out, and then let it go?
[He lifts the sword a little bit, clearly shifting his focus to it, brows creasing, and just trying to... figure out where that sensation comes from. His chest? Skin? The weird centering chi stuff Law talked about sometimes? His brows furrow, clearly just-- trying to think about this, but also not too hard because he would love to go a stretch of like two days without getting burns and blisters somewhere.
After a long moment of nothing happening he sighs, drops his arm with the blade, and brings up the other to scratch at his head.]
This is actually pretty hard. Trying to sort of... focus on it but not let it actually happen yet?
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Kratos doesn't seem too surprised by the lack of results. This is, after all, a weird new thing they're dealing with. He sheaths his sword and approaches to give Lloyd a hair ruffle.]
I know it sounds simple in theory, but it may be a while before you start to see results. I would think that with your exsphere, you should have an easier time with it, but... Actually, how is your exsphere?
[the last time he really paid attention to it, it kind of looked like shit bro. son. broson.]
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Uh... a little better than it was? [He swaps hands with the sword, not quite ready to give up, but okay with this little break and the encouragement. And he'll bring up his hand to showcase it- still matte, still far too dark, but that dark, streaking discolouration seeping out from under his keycrest looks less like necrotic distorted veins, and more defined and glossy patches. So maybe?? Slow improvement? Or slow transformation. Who can say.]
I don't know if it's that relic curse or from being in so much of that incense or what... [And he wasn't really in a position to actually discuss it immediately afterwards.] I... was definitely in a lot of the incense that day.
[You know, carrying around the source of it like an idiot.] But I haven't really left Coatepec since then, and it looks less dead so I'm thinking 'incense.'
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Considering the fact that so far, it seems like everyone who's transformed has done so pretty much instantaneously, Lloyd slowly transforming into A Thing isn't up at the top of Kratos's list of concerns right now. He takes Lloyd's hand and leans in for a closer look, brow knitting together a bit and for just a moment. He's concerned, of course, but he's not sure what he should be concerned about in this situation.]
I would think that it's probably the incense as well, but it's entirely possible that both things are factoring into this. Is this painful at all?
[He rubs at a bit of the discolored skin coming from under Lloyd's keycrest with his thumb. This is MMMMaybe a bit alarming? Not that Kratos ever looks that alarmed, but look this isn't normal.]
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Look, he knows Enough about Exspheres, though. As much as Dirk had told him (a very neutered version, be that on purpose, or because surface living distanced him from the truth, who knows), and then as much as he'd learned over the whole journey. And them looking all weird like this is definitely not anything he's heard of. And Kratos not knowing about it either?
Kind of amps up the unease. Not that he'll let that show. After all, what is there to even do about it? He won't survive well in this place without his exsphere, so removing it for good isn't an option. At least he doesn't flinch or anything as it's pressed on, and even flexes his hand normally.]
It doesn't really hurt. [But based on that response, doesn't feel quite normal either.] Before this, sometimes it'd start itching if I was out in the incense for too long. But I'd try not to stay out too long after that, since I know it makes you kinda crazy.
[Like 'stab your best friend several times with the intent to kill' crazy. You know.]
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Kratos also doesn't let his unease show, since freaking the boy out would be counterproductive. He releases Lloyd's hand and reaches up to squeeze his shoulder, which is probably just as much to comfort himself as it was for Lloyd. It's fine don't worry about it.]
I see. Perhaps removing this for a little while to see if it clears up wouldn't be a bad idea. Or have you already tried that?
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I thought about it, but-- well.
[Long pause. More stupid embarrassing bullshit.]
Healing artes don't work as well without one, right? I thought I remembered the Professor saying that... [ONE DAY HE'LL STOP FRYING HIMSELF??] And, you know, with this place being how it is, it didn't seem like a good idea...
[he probably should have, smfh, ITS FINE HE'S AN IDIOT.] I could try now, though? For a few days?
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[It's fine man Kratos didn't think until JUST NOW to suggest he take it off to begin with. They're both idiots.]
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But a selfish part of him doesn't like the implications of it, should removing it improve things.]
...Okay. Remind me when we're done with this, and I'll... Let you hang onto it, or something.
[Gonna be weird man, but okay. It's better than melting inside or whatever the fuck is happening.]
Should I keep it on now? You said it might make the mana-using easier.
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[It's YOUR momrock, buddy. ANYWAY, TRAINING.]
For now, I think it's fine to keep it on. Are you ready to start again?
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Yeah. Maybe I should think about it less?
[Less thinking, more doing. It's worked with everything else in his life. And so he'll take a few steps to put some distance between them, just in case, and sigh out a breath. Okay. Not the time to worry about his weird hand and exsphere. Just gotta try and figure out how to trigger that spark around him without being pissed off, and without letting it manifest on his damn skin.
His eyes close for a moment again, trying to concentrate on that feeling again. And this time, trying not to think or restrain or cage away from the idea that he'll probably just be hurting himself again. Like a warmth, or a sort of tingle, or heat? Or maybe just like a feeling like a strong emotion? Imagining feeling something like that, and casting it out--
This time he tries a little longer, and while there's no flash of flame along the blade of his sword, there is absolutely a line of fire that follows the direction of it, only on the ground. So, you know, a few feet too low. But the same direction??? The concept?? And his pants aren't on fire, so that's great.]
-Woah! [He's still gonna step back, though. Because, HEY, FIRE. A long, thin line of it, about four or five feet from him, casually burning away. Nice.]
Better? [HE THINKS IT'S BETTER maybe???]
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He steps back to give Lloyd some space, crossing his arms while he watches Lloyd. He's ready to put out any boy fires or heal any burns, because he's fully expecting an accident or five before Lloyd really gets it. BUT, then Lloyd's slinging flames from his sword. The ground is a little crispy and on fire a bit, but that's still way better than Kratos had been expecting.]
That-- that was great, Lloyd!
[LLOYD He's so proud of you!! Kratos uncrosses his arms, gives Lloyd a manly pat on the shoulder, and goes over to inspect the flames.]
You're really getting the hang of this quicker than I expected. It took me a few weeks to do something like this.
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That... yeah? [He had been about to criticize himself for not getting it right. He managed to get the flames to happen, and make them not on him but the origination point was all wrong, the way it manifested hadn't been what he was hoping for. The only thing that was right was the fact that something happened and the vector of it.
But-- that's not what he gets from Kratos. Instead it's a compliment, another paternal touch to him as a show of pride. No 'sloppy and needs work', no 'unrefined', nothing like that. And so he smile that flickers across his face is dumb and earnest and lopsided as he sheepishly lets his shoulders raise.]
Well-- if Yuan hadn't been teaching you wrong...
[It's said as he tips his head down a bit, not really known what to do with only...? Positive comments there??]
And- I mean, it helps that I did it a lot, before! Just... there was all the incense and stuff, then... And I still gotta figure out how to do it faster and-- you know, right....
But thanks.
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He even chuckles at Lloyd's comment about shithead Yuan.]
Heh. I'm just happy to see that it's definitely possible to keep from burning yourself. With a little more practice, you'll be able to better control the flame's point of origin.
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[And the whole 'emotional outbursts' thing still is another problem entirely. But hey, at least they're getting closer?? And it gives him an excuse to actually spend time with Kratos, doing things other than avoiding conversation subjects and being awkward.]
Alright! I'll do it as many times as I need, then!
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He doesn't want that.]
If anyone can do it, it's you. Just be sure you don't over do it.
[Lloyd's already proven that he can do fucking anything. Except for math. Anyway, Kratos returns to Lloyd's side, well out of any potential fireball range.]
Ready to try again?
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But great, he nods!]
When do I ever! [Overdo it, he means. And the answer is 'always'. But alright, all hopped up and full of encouragement, he looks ahead again, where those flames are petering out. Good thing they're away from any big thickets of greenery.]
Alright... Higher up, this time. And not as far...? [Line of fire=yes, but like. Up, channeled through the blade, and not just on the ground. And perhaps because of the previous success, he'd a bit less careful this time, trying to recall that same feeling, trying to pick a place for it and--
Bursting his damn arm into flames, which immediately has him cursing and batting at it with the other hand. Goddamnit.]
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And yes the answer is ALWAYS, but Kratos just lets it slide... in favor of whipping off his COOL scarf and using it to snuff the fire on Lloyd's dumb arm. He wastes no time casting First Aid on the boy.]
Got a bit too excited?
[He's not ripping on him, just trying to find what brought on this little oopsie]
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I guess so... I tried to do it faster, I think? [And you know, was blinded by previous success.] Probably got overconfident...
[Which we all know is a slow and insidious killer.]
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Probably. Let's not worry about speed until we have technique down. Right now we're at the slow and steady stage.
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Of course not. Hell, that first time was probably a fluke. Back to square one.]
Yeah... you're right. I guess first is just getting it under control... [Which basically means 'anything that doesn't set himself on fire is progress'. Ugh. Stupid fire curse.]
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